SERMON SERIES:        BYA:  Because You Asked

Sermon:                         What Do I Do About a Christian Who is Slipping?

Text:                              1 Corinthians 5:1-13    

       A while back, I had a friend of mine who is a pastor approach me with a dilemma he was facing.  He was at a cluster meeting when a lady from a nearby Methodist church asked him how he was doing and he said that he was staying busy working, going to school and all.  She asked him where he was going to school, and he said, “I go to Memphis Theological School” and the lady said, oh wonderful, our pastor who just left is going there.  She said his name and then mentioned how they were giving him scholarships to go to school.  My friend just said that’s nice and quickly ended the conversation because he knew two things:  First, he knew who her former pastor was, they were good friends, and second… he knew he wasn’t going to school at MTS, nor anywhere else.  

          Now he asked me, “Barry, what do you think I should do?  Should I confront him about it, I mean…this is a church giving him money. Or should I turn him in, or should I just let it go. What do you think?”  Let me ask you, what do you think I should have said to him? What would you have said?  Or better yet, what would you have done if you were my friend?

          Now the easiest  thing would be to simply look the other way and say, “This is not my problem!”  Besides the bible does says in Matthew 7:1 “Do not judge, for you too will be judged.”  Who am I to say that what he is doing is wrong.  Who am I to tell him how to live his life?  It’s not my place.  But the bible says in Galatians 6:1 that, “if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently.”  So which is it?  What do we do when we see another Christian slipping into sin? 

          Now there was a time when Christian accountability and church discipline were a natural part of being a Christian.  When you became a member of a church, you placed your self under the care of that church and also under the authority of that church and that church held you accountable for your Christian walk.   But to often the church avoids addressing and correcting a wayward Christian. We don’t want to infringe on their privacy, or appear to be judgmental.   

So the question is, “What are we to do when there is a Christian brother or sister who we see slipping into sin?”  This was one of the questions I was asked, and I thought well surely they must be thinking about someone outside our church because surely  no one in our church is slipping into sin!  Just kidding, but this is something all of us need to hear because as much as we may not like hearing it, we are indeed our brother’s keeper and we are called not only to encourage and lift each other up, but also to hold each other accountable for our Christian walks.  But there is a right way to go about it and a wrong way.  So let’s study look at how this works this morning.

Now I feel for the Apostle Paul. Paul was away at the town of Ephesus dealing with the issues that we going on there, when he got word about stuff going on in the church he had started in the town of Corinth.    The problem was a serious one.  Not only was it serious but it was very public.  Everyone knew about it.  There was a man in the church, who was involved in a relationship with his step mom.  (This would have made a great Jerry Springer episode!) It was so bad that Paul said that even those outside the church who weren’t even worried about trying to be holy were saying, “Man…that just ain’t right. That’s just wrong.”  Everybody was talking about how wrong it was except for one group…and that was the church.

It appears that everyone in the church knew what was going on because Paul says that not even the pagans would tolerate this but you are proud! And they were allowing it to continue.  Now that word proud struck me.  Why would a church be proud about such a thing. Perhaps they were proud saying… “Look how tolerant and non-judgmental we are!”  But I think a better way of looking at this as not so much as proud but rather as the NRSB translates it as arrogance.   They were so arrogant that they didn’t think it was a problem to get worked up about.  They weren’t the ones guilty of incest, so why worry about it…and so they did nothing about it. 

And Paul says your heart should be breaking because of this.  The rest of the world is looking at you and saying its not right but you are sitting back and doing nothing about it.  Remember the scandal with the Catholic Priest and the sexual abuse.  Now that was so bad that even those who make it a habit to indulge in sin were saying “How could you do something like that!” and as bad as that was, what made people so upset was that the church was doing nothing about it.  Kids lives were being destroyed and the church kept saying It’s not an issue we’re going to deal with and got defiant when confronted with it.  Paul would say, “You’re arrogant!  You should be in tears because of this and you should have confronted this issue a long time ago!”    You can’t ignore these kinds of things when they happen in the church.

Now when we see flagrant and continuous sin in our church, why should we be concerned about it?  If it’s not me doing it, why is it my problem?    Well, you should be concerned because that one person can damage the testimony of the whole church.  Think about the Catholic Priest scandal…now there are plenty of great Catholic priest, I know some…but when all that was going on the testimony of the entire church was damaged…not just those priest who were guilty of the abuse.  In Corinth, this church was having its good name ruined because people were associating this man’s sin with the entire church. 

The word for church is the Ekklesia and it means the called out ones. We are to be called out and be different especially in our attitude toward sin.  Now, I feel the need to make a few clarifications here.     We must address flagrant and continues sin in our church.  We’re not to get out our little detective kits and start looking in each other’s windows pointing out every little thing we see wrong.     For the most part, we are supposed to overlook the faults of others.  In fact, 1 Peter 4:8 says, “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” 

Jesus once told a story about a farmer who went out to the field and he planted good wheat, but that night an enemy came and sowed weeds.  They both began to grow and some of the servants said, “Should we go pull up the weeds” and he said, no because you may root up some of the wheat with them.  Let them grow until the harvest, and then I will separate them.”   So don’t get disturbed that the church is not 100% pure.  Expect imperfections in the church.  One day He will separate the true from the false, and He is qualified to do that, we aren’t.  SO we don’t yank up every person who sins in church because if that was the case, we wouldn’t have anyone left. 

But if a sin is flagrant and continuous and is affecting the testimony of the church, then it must be confronted.  John Wilson, a preacher in Springfield, Ohio, said that a church must determine if it has measles or cancer.  If it has measles, let it go and it will get better.  If it has cancer, then it has to be confronted and dealt with or it will kill the church.  

   Now we also need to be concerned about flagrant and continuous sin because it has the power to impact the entire church.   1 Cor 5:6-7 (TLB), “⁶ What a terrible thing it is that you are boasting about your purity and yet you let this sort of thing go on. Don't you realize that if even one person is allowed to go on sinning, soon all will be affected? ⁷ Remove this evil cancer--this wicked person--from among you, so that you can stay pure. Christ, God's Lamb, has been slain for us.”  If you don’t remove that sin, then young people are going to look at it and say, “Oh, it must be okay.” 

Also, pretty soon it will impact the work of the Spirit in the church.  All because of that one sin. Remember the story of Achan?  When Joshua and the Israelites went into the promised land, God was with them and they breased through the battles, no one even came close.  But God told them, don’t plunder those you defeat, don’t take their stuff.  But one man named Achan saw the bright jewels and precious idols, and so he took some and hid it in his tent.  When Joshua and the Israelites went into battle that next day, they thought they were going to breeze through it again, but God had removed His spirit from that group, and Joshua said “Why?” and the Lord said “Because there is sin in the camp!” And so Joshua had to remove Achan from the fellowship and then God blessed them once more.

   So we need to be concerned because of the impact it has on the testimony of the church, because of the impact it has on the church body itself, but also, we ought to be concerned because we care about that person.  1 Cor 5:4-5 (Message) says, “Assemble the community— I'll be present in spirit with you and our Master Jesus will be present in power. ⁵ Hold this man's conduct up to public scrutiny. Let him defend it if he can! But if he can't, then out with him! It will be totally devastating to him, of course, and embarrassing to you. But better devastation and embarrassment than damnation. You want him on his feet and forgiven before the Master on the Day of Judgment.” 

We know where the path of sin leads, it leads to destruction, and we must care enough about that person to try to get them off that path. Think about all the young Hollywood actresses in the news, getting in trouble…just think if those around them cared enough to say, “Stop doing what you are doing. You’re hurting yourself.” 

When I was pasturing a church in Clara, MS, we had a homecoming service and Curtis Cain came and spoke for us. Curtis grew up in that church, and he said that one of the things that he remembers most and what made the most impact on him was when he was young, if he was starting to go the wrong way…talking back, being disrespectful…he said that after church on Sunday, one of the old men in the church would come and grab his shoulder and say, “Curtis, let’s take a walk.”  And he said that he remembers often one of those big hands coming down on him, and then they would go behind that little church down a sloping little beaten down dirt path with giant pine trees on each side to the little creek where they would talk and gently, Curtis would be told that more was expected of him and he was not acting the way a Christian boy ought to be acting.  And he said that they would walk back up the hill together, and he said he would feel guilty for a while, mad at others, but now he realized why those men did what they did.  Even though he wasn’t their kid, or their grand kid, he belonged to their church so to them…he was their kid.  Oh, I wish we had more beaten down dirt paths behind churches today. 

So in this church in Corinth, Paul said it is your responsibility to confront this sin and stop associating with this man.  Now this sounds harsh, but understand that this is the last step in a process of accountability and restoration.  And it is done with the hope that the person will see the ill in their way and repent and return to the Lord.

          So how does this process work.     Well the first step is self examination.  Jesus said in Matthew 7:3-5 in the New Century Bible.  “Why do you notice the little piece of dust in your friend's eye, but you don't notice the big piece of wood in your own eye? ⁴ How can you say to your friend, 'Let me take that little piece of dust out of your eye'? Look at yourself! You still have that big piece of wood in your own eye. ⁵ You hypocrite! First, take the wood out of your own eye. Then you will see clearly to take the dust out of your friend's eye.”  Ask yourself, do you have sin that you need to repent of ?  If so, then do so.  Is your motive pure, or are you just wanting to give what for (a Piece of your mind!). 

             Second step is to talk to God about that person first.  Lift them up in prayer and ask God to convict that person so that they may turn away from their sin. 

   After you do that, the next step is gentle confrontation.  Jesus said in Matthew 18:15, "If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over.”  Don’t raise a fuss, don’t start rumors, just go and confront that person, and do so gently.  Remember Galatians 6:1 said to restore them gently.  The word there for restore means to reset a broken bone or to reset a dislocated bone.  If you have a broken bone, you don’t want the doctor to be harsh, you want him to be gentle.     So when you confront, don’t berate the person, calling them names and such.  Be gentle.  And you will find that most will stop right here.  You will find that most know that are caught in this sin, and they needed someone to help them out. 

             Now if they don’t listen to you, then the next step is group intervention.   Jesus said in Matt 18:16-17 (NIV), “But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.' ¹⁷ If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector.” 

          Now this takes courage.  The person may get mad and tell others how unloving you are, but the hope is that it will cause him to wake up and see what is going on.  Now we don’t do this enough in the church, but in secular society this has been big.  There is even a show on A&E called “Intervention” where a group of people confront a person with their problem and put real consequences on them if they don’t change.  Think, this ain’t new…Jesus started this 2000 years ago.  But if he doesn’t want to change…then and only then do you say to him, I can no longer call you my brother in Christ.  You still are cordial to them, you’re still nice…but you don’t include them in the fellowship. 

          Now this is the last resort, but by no means is it the last step.   The last step is restoration.  This man in the Corinthian Church had committed an awful sin, everyone knew about it, and it appears that the church took Paul’s advice…and it had an impact on the man.  When Paul writes again to the Corinthian church in 2 Cor 2:5-7 (NIV), he says, “If anyone has caused grief, he has not so much grieved me as he has grieved all of you, to some extent--not to put it too severely. ⁶ The punishment inflicted on him by the majority is sufficient for him. ⁷ Now instead, you ought to forgive and comfort him, so that he will not be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. 8 I urge you, therefore, to reaffirm your love for him.”

          The man had suffered enough.  He was filled with grief and was ready to repent.  Now it was time for the church to forgive.  There is no place in the fellowship of the church for grudges.  And they were to comfort him.  And then I love this, they were to restore their love for him.  I think that this needs to be done in a public way so that everyone knows, that this man has been restored to the fellowship of the church.

 Yes there was hurt, but actions were taken and now it is time to forgive.  This past week I had a class and I wasn’t thrilled in taking it but it was a powerful class.  It was taught by a man from Africa who has been involved with the struggles that took place with Apartied in South Africa, and the genocide in Rwanda.  And he told the story about Rwanda, and most know what happened in Rwanda, where hundreds of thousands were killed, not by outsiders, but where brother turned against brother, cousin and cousin, and whole villages were torn apart.  To call it a civil war is putting it to mildly.  Bodies were cut up and discarded, many just thown in the weeds for the animals, others in mass graves.  As the war ended, some of the villages wanted to restore the village, and bring healing.  And so the village chief would have the people gather around and give those guilty of the crimes to tell what they had done and tell where they had buried the bodies so that that person could have a decent burial.  In one village, the chief had everyone gather around, and one man said, “I killed three people with a rifle, and I placed their bodies by the river.” The chief said, “Thank you for telling us. Now we can bury them”

This went on, and then one man who was not a member of this village but had to flee his home and he escaped and now he was on his way back home  began to tell about a man he had killed, and he gave his name.  He talked about how he had slowly tortured him, hearing him cry, and then he chopped him up with a machete, and how he discarded the body in a nearby village.  Now as he said this, he had no idea that this was the village that man was from, and that the mother of the man who he had chopped to pieces was sitting right across from him.  As the man cried and described all that he had done, the chief said “Thank you for telling us and now we can give our friend a decent burial.  You have a long journey ahead of you, and the rainy season is upon us.  We will build you a place to stay until the rainy season passes, but it will take a while to build you a house, until then you may stay in one of our homes.”  And would you believe the first person to raise their hand to invite this young man to stay with her, was the mother of the man this guy had murdered.  This man had done wrong, but now that village was going to restore him once more. 

Sometimes the hardest part is not the shunning of the guilty person, but it’s the restoring of that person back into the life of the church.  The church is a place where we love and accept each other, but it’s also a place where we hold each other accountable in love.  And we do so, because we know that this is place of grace and forgiveness.  And it can be for you this morning.   

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